hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
My ass is underappreciated
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
