: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
