I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
