he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
