and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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