I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
