i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
