New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Randomize
