It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
