pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
