Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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