whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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