i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
