There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
