I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize