thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
