..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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