What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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