I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
