I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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