I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
