Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
