My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
