You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
