a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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