I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
