his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
