This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
