Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
