matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
