it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
