This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
