we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
nutella sex= disaster
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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