Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
