there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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