i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
