I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
