Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
The power of my boobs compel you
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize