Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize