My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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