why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
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