just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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