Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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