He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
All the doctor said was why
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
