Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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