His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
