i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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