Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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