sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
