just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Randomize
